Taking time to Care for Yourself
Most women are so busy taking care of everyone else that they don't have time to take care of themselves. It's the one factor that connects almost every woman that sits in my chair.
Especially mothers of small children... almost every time a mom sits in my chair for a service, her cell phone rings and it's her husband/child/parent or boss. I play a little game in my head and see if I can figure out which it is by her response. The calls are so predictable that I can probably tell you that if Sally is in, it will happen at the 20 minute mark into her appointment. I can tell that it will be her husband or child asking " When will you be home?"or " What's for dinner?"
I'm not sure why women feel they cannot come into the salon/spa and get a service without having to micro-manage everything going on at home... most women will say it's just easier to answer the call or they will come home to...what? I ask. What is so important that your spouse/partner can't take care of it without interrupting you? I usually get a response that starts with, " Well, if I don't do it..."
According to a stats can study: "Women who were the sole wage earner in a couple, spent more time on child care—50.8 hours per week. A similar amount of time (49.8 hours per week) was spent on child care by women who were part of a dual-earner couple and worked full-time. If they worked part-time, women who were part of a dual-earner couple spent an average of 59.4 hours per week on unpaid child care..." and even more amazingly...
" In 2010, women spent an average of 50.1 hours per week on child care, more than double the average time (24.4 hours) spent by men."
Did you notice that it didn't matter if the woman was the sole wage earner or part of a dual income family? Woman spent almost double the time on child care than men.
We all have busy lives... we all need to decompress. In my experience women are the biggest users/believers in the term balance. Probably because we take on so much that just the idea of a balanced life, with time to relax and recharge, would be like winning the lottery. Funny enough, I know a place you can sit, relax and let someone take care of you... that place is in my chair!
So here are a few pointers to help you let go of the guilt and NOT answer those inevitable calls from your spouse/partner/children the moment you get in my chair. Come on girls, you know that 9 times out of 10 they are phone calls that need not be answered...
1) First things first... they only do it because you let them. I firmly believe this. We know that things happen and sometimes you need to answer an emergency call, but is it really an emergency? Most times judging by my eavesdropping... (don't judge me, you are right in front of me, I CAN hear what you're saying ) it's not.
2) Please don't talk about your personal stuff on that phone call. I CAN hear you, AND your spouse/partner too. You need to think of your time in my chair as a mini vacation from whatever trouble/ drama that is going on at home. I'm always here to listen, but not to fights, arguments or make-up talk.
3) Plan your visit... some of the most common calls start with the Spouse/Partner asking... "When are you done? When will you be home? What do I feed the kids? What time is Billy's soccer practice or Sally's ballet class?.." If you recognize any of these questions then you have failed to pre-plan, or your spouse/partner isn't a good listener or both. We all lead busy lives and sometimes things get lost in translation... a simple note on the fridge or a detailed text to your significant other can help stop the calls.
4) You like being needed and don't mind the calls. That's great but teaching your family a little independence from you will pay off for you and them in the end. They learn to cope without you for a few hours and you get the break you desperately need.
Viv is an award winning stylist with 30 years experience, constant training and a passion for style and service!
